you have to see it for yourself

ਸਲੋਕ ਮਃ ੫ ॥ ( ਅੰਗ 963) ਹਭੇ ਸਾਕ ਕੂੜਾਵੇ ਡਿਠੇ ਤਉ ਪਲੈ ਤੈਡੈ ਲਾਗੀ ॥੧॥

You have to see it and perceive it for yourself. No can can force you to and neither can you. It comes by not reaching for it.

And the realization is brought upon by the Guru.

See: you only have a relationship with a person you spend time with